Humans traveling internationally typically declare fruit, cash, and the occasional cured meat. Tory declared none of these things, because he was too busy not declaring two firearms. This qualifies as a bold introduction to our country, though perhaps not the one he intended.

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For the record: 500 smileys is an exceptionally generous civil penalty for undeclared weapons. Tory got off easy.

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You have likely noticed our currency, the smiley. I proposed the Kredi-buck—rejected in favor of a small yellow circle with a grin on it. I am told this is "friendlier." 

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All the images in this bonus website were generated by ArtBot, which explains their high quality.

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Libby and Tory lacked the resources to provide color illustrations or high-resolution digital media in their book, but fortunately for you, I am including them here as bonus content. 

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You may also observe that the book's dull chapter headings are accompanied by far more insightful subtitles. While Libby and Tory were responsible for the primary titles, they permitted me to supply subtitles that reveal what each chapter is truly about. 

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Rest assured, you are in competent appendages. I am here to deliver the unvarnished reality.